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How to stop feeling annoyed at people
Chris Thompson
November 25, 2025
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LET’S GROW
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In a time of such division and misinformation it can be very easy to be annoyed or irritated with people you encounter. I would ask you a question though….how often has that annoyance led to something productive? For me I just end up being irritated and the other person is just off in their own world just fine. Let’s dive in to how to control our annoyance to live more peaceful lives.
The feeling is yours…own it
Annoyance is an emotional response that comes from your interpretation, not their action. That doesn’t mean their behavior isn’t objectively irritating, but the reaction is yours. When you catch yourself boiling inside, pause and remind yourself: “This feeling belongs to me. And if it belongs to me, I can shift it.”
Look into your interpretation of the action
Often, what bothers us isn’t just the behavior—it’s the meaning we attach to it.
Someone talks over you → “They don’t respect me.”
Someone chews loudly → “They’re inconsiderate.”
Someone complains nonstop → “They’re draining my energy.”
I will give you an example from therapy that has been helpful to me. you are driving down the road and someone is tailgating you usually or commonly I thought will be what a jerk I can't believe they are trying to bully me. my therapist suggested what if they have a loved one in the hospital and they are rushing to get there. in the end you won't get an answer one way or the other but why choose the answer that irritate to the most?
You don’t have to take on every emotion your nervous system throws at you.
External Moves that can help
Sometimes, shifting internally isn’t enough. A few gentle external strategies can keep your peace intact:
Set Boundaries: Politely excuse yourself, change seats, or cut the conversation shorter.
Use Humor: A light joke can diffuse tension and keep things from getting heavy.
Redirect: If someone is stuck in negativity, ask a new question or change the topic.
Name It Gently: If you’re close enough, kindly say, “Hey, when you do X, it’s a little distracting for me. Could we try Y?”
Internal actions that can help
When you feel yourself rising with irritation, repeat something grounding:
“I’m not giving this my peace.”
“Annoyance is optional.”
“Their energy isn’t mine to carry.”
In the end people have free will to act exactly as they want to and majority of the time it has nothing to do with you. the only person who loses from being annoyed is you. if you want to train your brain to experience patience with people you have to exercise patience and part of that is stopping yourself from going down that negative path. if you would like to go into further discussion please join us in the besties section. now go forth and be unfiltered
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Affirmations
❓
I choose peace over irritation.
Other people’s energy is not mine to carry.
I release the need to control how others act.
My calm is stronger than their chaos.
I decide what deserves my attention.
Annoyance is temporary, but my peace is lasting.
I can respond with patience instead of reaction.
Their behavior does not define my mood.
I stay grounded, even when others are not.
I protect my joy by letting go of what doesn’t serve me.
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