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- I think you should stop working on yourself
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LET’S GROW
I think you should stop working on yourself
This sentence sounds crazy, especially in a newsletter like this, but hear me out.
I had to learn the hard way in my relationships with people not to fall in love with potential. Most people never make it to their full potential, and frankly, that is not fair to them either, because you are not accepting them as they are.
So there you are, waiting around for the relationship that you want with that person. Why would that not be the same idea if you applied it to the relationship with yourself?
I get it , potential is intoxicating.
Potential doesn’t argue with you.
Potential doesn’t disappoint you.
Potential doesn’t forget to text back or avoid hard conversations.
Potential lives in the future.
And the future is easy to idealize.
When we attach to potential, we get to
Feel like the visionary, Feel loyal, Feel patient, Feel like we’re investing wisely
But we are often investing in a projection. Until potential is realized, it’s just an idea and a future possibility, and we can’t live there.
This keeps us stuck, and then we wonder why nothing is changing.
We date our own potential the same way we date other people’s. We love the idea of who we might become more than who we are right now.
And sometimes that’s inspiration. Sometimes it’s avoidance…
Potential without action is fantasy. And fantasy feels safer than clarity… Because clarity might mean walking away… oof.
Why Taking a Break From Working on Yourself Is Healthy
You are not a project. You are not a fixer-upper. You are not a constant before and after photo waiting to happen.
Growth is beautiful.
Healing is powerful.
Self-awareness is liberating.
But if you never stop “working on yourself,” you subtly send yourself one message over and over again:
“Who I am right now isn’t enough.”
You can believe in your potential without living in constant self-correction. You can evolve
without treating yourself like a problem. You can grow and also rest.
One of the biggest lessons I have learned from accepting myself as I am is that as I learn to love who I am, I also learn to accept that love from others. Beyond that, I teach others how I am to be loved.
I am so proud of you for working so hard. Don’t forget that who you are now would be so impressive to who you used to be. Take a moment to appreciate you.
When it all clicks.
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Affirmations
❓
I am allowed to rest without falling behind.
I do not have to earn my worth through constant self-improvement.
Who I am right now is enough to be loved.
I can believe in my potential without rejecting my present self.
Growth and rest can exist at the same time.
I release the fantasy of who I “should” become and honor who I am today.
I choose clarity over projection — with myself and with others.
I am not a project to fix; I am a person to understand.
I trust that becoming happens naturally when I stop forcing it.
The version of me I used to be would be proud of who I am now.
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